sam thank you so much for creating this site. I am an older gay person that has been quite confused of what I really am. I managed to create a stable and happy gay relationship, but with time realising that the sex side has been somehow not interesting. the more I was reading the more I felt the need to submit to dominant men. However my husband has no interest in playing a dominant role, so I often submit to escort services. the more I read your site and the more I believe that in my sexual life I am basically a faggot. I wonder if among your reader there are many that are struggling like me. On one side I need and want to hold on to my wonderful relation, but on the other side,  it is getting more and more frustrating not to be able to really be and act as the faggot I really am. keep on with your real good work.

Thanks for writing! Yes, I’ve absolutely met many faggots (and some Alphas) in circumstances similar to yours. It’s heartbreaking that you cannot fully express your needs with your partner, but honestly, it’s unreasonable to expect that one person can be the entirety of another person’s life. This is especially true for Alphas and faggots on the most extreme ends of the Hierarchical spectrum.
Since you’re an older couple, perhaps the sex has taken a backseat to companionship. Maybe your partner wouldn’t mind you going into a service relationship with an Alpha. Have you discussed this? As always, it’s best to clear the air in situations like this.
If your partner refuses to accept this reality within you, I’m not sure about your next step. Are you at the point where you can simply accept keeping the security of the relationship and put aside your desire to serve? Or do you break it up in order to chase this dream? I can’t be the one to tell you that.
Just start with the conversation and see where it leads, brother.

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