So the more i read this blog the deeper i get into the frightening realization that truly i am a faggot, which is of no surprise, as i was constantly bullied when i was young, many men have taken advantage of me by instilling their power over me and now it all kind of make sense, it feels like it is my destiny. But i yearn to be trained. Most of the times I’m horny and used to stroke again and again till maybe my dopamine was off and sometimes felt a little depressed after finishing so i bought a cage which doesn’t help a lot. I will either wear it when I’m alone and play with my hole, or not at all, as my top isn’t very interested in chastity (yet i have worn it a couple of times when he fucked me), but now when i finish i mostly feel ashamed, i don’t know if it’s because i keep fantasizing about serving an Alpha or because my top isn’t interested my new needs or because as a fag I’m not meant to cum at all

My little brother, I’m so proud of you! This kind of realization takes some faggots many years to understand! Your plaintive “I yearn to be trained” nearly broke my heart! 
It’s sad that your current Top has no appreciation for what you’re going through or his important role in training his subs/faggots. He also has apparently no appreciation for your submission at all, no thought about why you submit to him or what it means to you. That’s disappointing. There’s a whole world of growth both of you are missing out on simply because of his thoughtlessness.
Have you tried discussing your need for training with this Top? I would definitely begin there if you haven’t already done so. 
There are definitely Alphas who would jump at the opportunity to train a young eager faggot like you. If you’d like, I invite you to join the FWA Discord server. There you will have an opportunity to talk to many Alphas and Masters who are all very experienced at faggot training and ownership. Here is the link: 

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